Never can say goodbye...

     One of my favourite people and really good friend left a few weeks ago.  It’s really sad b/c there’s a good chance we won’t see each other again – at least for a long time.  We both have plans to travel and explore.  It just sucks that, as part of this job we chose, we lose a lot of friends.  It’s a constant turnover and some are not replaced by good people.  Another friend is leaving at the end of the month.  And my coworker and friend left only to be switched for a person I can’t stand!  Really terrible, arrogant condescending, rude, manipulative, loud, irritating, selfish, and the list goes on.  But I digress…

     The job requires a contract for a year or so and if you do well you can extend (which I did for a year).  Basically this job is something to fill the time before you move on to (hopefully) bigger and better things.  To save money, b/c we are the lucky few that have jobs, and travel or go back to school or do something other than what we do in Japan or Korea or China or whatever.  Maybe this job is good experience and will look good on your resume.  But in the grand scheme of things this is a “now” job and is seen as such by some other people.  I do have friends that have been doing this for years and years but still talk about what they will do next. 

     There’s nothing wrong with it.  It just makes me reflect that this life is temporary.  I might stay for a long time but others will leave and our friendships will maybe fade or end.  It may seem sad and depressing but it’s the truth.  You might maintain contact with those few special people back home but then more and more time passes and you know less and less about them and they you.  After a couple months I had already felt myself drifting from friends.  The time difference doesn’t help.  But there have been so many times when I think so-and-so would think this is funny.  But the time passes and you can’t connect with that person instantly like you could before.  So many times my sister says “I had something funny to tell you!  But I forgot!”  It happens so many times to everyone on both sides.

     I also miss out on so many things back home and have no idea what is going on.  My friend is getting married and I was supposed to be in the wedding but b/c I can’t take my vacation days I can’t come home for it and had to tell her I couldn’t be there for her.  I can’t be there for any of her events – engagement party, bachelorette, wedding shower, WEDDING! She understands of course but it doesn’t make it any less hard.

     I also have 2 parents going through a really hard time in their lives and a brother making a big life decision.  Of course they are missing big things here with me too.  I know they will be fine and do great but it doesn’t stop me from worrying and thinking I should be there for them.  I also think so often that my brother and sister should be here for this reason or another.  Like the Penis Festival! Good times all around!!! 

     Anyway, I’m not sad I’m here and don’t regret my decision and am doing 350% better than I was in Canada.  At home it was a bad situation and my life has improved since moving to Japan.  I just worry how things will be when I go home, for however long that is.  Will I still be able to talk to my friends the same way?  Will it be easy or strained?  Will they like my gifts?  So many questions!

     I am grateful I have a job and I enjoy it (most of the time).  But there are those days when I regret extending my contract but then I think, "If I quit, what else will I do?"  I'll be coming up on my one year anniversary in a couple months and then will be visiting Canada soon after.  It'll be time to reassess things and try to make a long-term goal and plan so I'm not just some wandering drifter with no plan in sight.  Any suggestions?

1, 2, 3! Three things to read!

It’s been a long while since I wrote last! Whew! Lots has happened.  Where to begin?

1) We started a new semester and I got some news kids – kids from the other teacher and new kids to the school.  On the plus side I was able to get rid of some, shall we say, spirited children :)  Most of my kids this year are great!  I do have some rude ones and difficult ones and kids that are way behind the others that shouldn’t have been moved up but did b/c of their age.  That’s kinda frustrating b/c I think they should have certain requirements to move on.  If you can’t read and handle the current lessons why move on?

     Some other kids are just getting out of mommy and me classes so they are really difficult.  Literally they just cry and cry and cry.  My first 4 classes with these couple of two years old was picking them up, hushing them, wiping their noses, and trying to stop them from screaming bloody murder and hitting me in frustration.  After a while one tired himself out he fell asleep on me and would cry every time I would try and put him down.  Finally when his mom came I found nose drippings all over my shoulder.  Lovely…but so darn cute!

     Other kids are just rude.  One 10 year was so rude and difficult I opened the door and told him he could leave.  He said he didn’t want to leave but I insisted.  He kept saying no so I let him stay and after that he’s been an angel :)

     I also have this class of 3 year olds that are just to cute for words.  They are very high-energy, sweet, and affectionate.  If I pretend to eat their toes they ALL shoe their toes in front of me to pretend to eat them too.  If I tickle one they ALL want to be tickled!  Besides the usual behaviour problem of not sitting down, listening, or repeating I have another problem that needs to be dealt with ASAP - touchers and biters.  Like last year, these little girls are curious and like to touch their teachers b/c it's just something they feel the need the need to do.  But these girls!  Oh man!  One little girl keeps putting her head in my lap and I always have to lift her up.  But last week she did it again and then started biting my inner thighs!! Seriously?  I immediately stopped her and told her not to do it again very firmly but she did it again a few minutes later.  Then another little girl went said, "Boom boom" as she patted each of my boobs!  I stopped and scolded her but, of course, she did it again.  I know they're curious and mean no harm but this has to be nipped in the bud...before I am nipped in the bud... :)

     I miss my other kids and get to hang with them between classes which is nice but I still wanted to teach them and watch their progress b/c they were doing so well.  It’s a little sad when you can’t teach them anymore.  Unfortunately, I lost a bunch of kids when the new semester started b/c they have club commitments and a lot of them move to other countries.  This year, one moved to Germany and others will move to India and Europe.

     It’s weird that I got so attached to my kids.  This was supposed to be a “limbo” job until I decided more about my life.  It still is but now I’m more involved with my kids.  I keep pestering my boss to get my kids to do extra lessons so they can learn to read and gain confidence.  I worry about the little ones that cry and the others that try so hard but just can’t hack it. 

     I’m also spending more time planning lessons to make them better and more personalized.  The adult students are particularly difficult b/c they need Japanese to English translation but the company doesn’t understand that.  Kids are easier b/c they don’t have as many rules, etc. ingrained in them.  But the adults – so hard to get through a lesson sometimes.  I’m constantly using translation apps.  They would be better suited with a Japanese teacher.

     I have another student who is physically disabled and so I design the class around her limitations.  She’s super-smart and so sweet.  She painstakingly made me origami wreaths as a present.  Her hands tire easily and shake constantly.  It was amazing and I was so touched.  The only word I can use to describe her is “lovely.”

2) Sakura was AMAZING!!!! I saw the pictures and I was told several times how beautiful it was but I still wasn’t prepared.  They came early this year b/c the weather was warmer this winter.  All of a sudden there were a couple blossoms then BAM! Blossoms everywhere!!!  Shades of pink and white, falling down from trees  and blanketing  the ground like snow.  These delicate little petals that just made you feel so warm and happy.  I was able to enjoy 3 whole weekends of them.

     We went to Shinjukugoen and the grounds were magnificent.  They had blossoms hanging from trees like waterfalls.  There was a huge open space, a green house, a French garden, and an English garden.  It looked like the garden from Alice in Wonderland :)  I also wanted to keep a blossom but I wanted a whole one, not just the petals.  So I picked one off the branch and my two friends audibly gasped like I had shot someone.  Then the other friend showed up, I told her what I did, and GASP!  Oops!  Oh well, I asked another friend if it was so terrible and she said it’s not really done…but she does it so it’s ok. Hahaha!!! Good enough for me!

     It was really great enjoying the sun and strolling along the river watching the petals fall.  It was truly a Japanese experience and I’m so grateful I was in Japan for it.

3) I went to the Penis Festival in Kawasaki!!! Technically it’s the “Fertility Festival” but everyone calls it the Penis Festival :)  It’s like a rite of passage for foreigners to attend this event.  There were SO MANY none Japanese peeps there!!! I’ve never seen so many at one place in J-land.  Seriously.  It was a frightening amount of people crushed into this small space trying to buy merchandise and take pics of the giant pink penis, Elizabeth.  He is pink for HIV awareness.  Anyway, there was a person carving penises out of various vegetables, there were penis pops of all colours and flavours.  There was a parade where cross dressers carried the different penis statues to the temple.  AND there were children with penis pops!!!  I tried taking a pic of one little girl with a small blue one but there were people that kept passing – so the dad had her pose for me! He wanted his kid to have the pic taken.  The same happened with a little boy – he had a large, pink one.  Him and his mom said pics were ok!!!

     I know, I know – this is controversial and terrible and exploitation and blah blah blah!!!! This would never fly in North America but this was harmless fun and everybody was enjoying themselves.  Let’s leave it at that :)  Needless to say, lots of fun was had when we went to Yoyogi park after and tasted the penis pops!  Good times!