One of my favourite people and really good friend left a
few weeks ago. It’s really sad b/c
there’s a good chance we won’t see each other again – at least for a long
time. We both have plans to travel
and explore. It just sucks that,
as part of this job we chose, we lose a lot of friends. It’s a constant turnover and some are
not replaced by good people.
Another friend is leaving at the end of the month. And my coworker and friend left only to be
switched for a person I can’t stand!
Really terrible, arrogant condescending, rude, manipulative, loud,
irritating, selfish, and the list goes on.
But I digress…
The job requires a contract for a year or so and if you do well you can
extend (which I did for a year).
Basically this job is something to fill the time before you move on to
(hopefully) bigger and better things.
To save money, b/c we are the lucky few that have jobs, and travel or go
back to school or do something other
than what we do in Japan or Korea or China or whatever. Maybe this job is good experience and
will look good on your resume. But
in the grand scheme of things this is a “now” job and is seen as such by some other
people. I do have friends that
have been doing this for years and years but still talk about what they will do
next.
There’s nothing wrong with it.
It just makes me reflect that this life is temporary. I might stay for a long time but others
will leave and our friendships will maybe fade or end. It may seem sad and depressing but it’s
the truth. You might maintain
contact with those few special people back home but then more and more time
passes and you know less and less about them and they you. After a couple months I had already
felt myself drifting from friends.
The time difference doesn’t help.
But there have been so many times when I think so-and-so would think
this is funny. But the time passes
and you can’t connect with that person instantly like you could before. So many times my sister says “I had
something funny to tell you! But I
forgot!” It happens so many times
to everyone on both sides.
I also miss out on so many things back home and have no idea what is
going on. My friend is getting
married and I was supposed to be in the wedding but b/c I can’t take my vacation
days I can’t come home for it and had to tell her I couldn’t be there for
her. I can’t be there for any of
her events – engagement party, bachelorette, wedding shower, WEDDING! She understands
of course but it doesn’t make it any less hard.
I also have 2 parents going through a really hard time in their lives
and a brother making a big life decision.
Of course they are missing big things here with me too. I know they will be fine and do great
but it doesn’t stop me from worrying and thinking I should be there for
them. I also think so often that
my brother and sister should be here for this reason or another. Like the Penis Festival! Good times all
around!!!
Anyway, I’m not sad I’m here and don’t regret my decision and am doing
350% better than I was in Canada.
At home it was a bad situation and my life has improved since moving to
Japan. I just worry how things
will be when I go home, for however long that is. Will I still be able to talk to my friends the same
way? Will it be easy or
strained? Will they like my gifts? So many questions!
I am grateful I have a job and I enjoy it (most of the time). But there are those days when I regret extending my contract but then I think, "If I quit, what else will I do?" I'll be coming up on my one year anniversary in a couple months and then will be visiting Canada soon after. It'll be time to reassess things and try to make a long-term goal and plan so I'm not just some wandering drifter with no plan in sight. Any suggestions?
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